What the Hell, America?

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Soooo much has happened this week not only in my laborious 9 to 5 gig but in my personal interests. I wanted to do an in-depth post about the joyous occasion of equal rights for the LGBT community. A long time coming, IMO. The misinformation over the Supreme Court’s decision is mind boggling and honestly, it’s a subject I don’t want to rush. To really make my point, I’m going to have to really dig into some research because that’s the only way to combat knee-jerk reactions–with cold, hard facts. Truth hurts, folks. Ignorance is far worse.

Hopefully I’ll gather my thoughts and share some interesting word play from Facebook and let you decide. Until then, Butthurt Bear sums it up for me. Feel free to use it, it’s the size for a Facebook Banner.

I’ve also got a little bit on the flag issue in the south as well. The #AskELJames thing? Not touching it. Nope. Enough has been said on the subject and, honestly, I’m at the honey badger level over that epic fail. Welcome he fun world of the internet!

The Tale of Creepy Jesus

One of the things my cousins and I reminisced about during my grandmother’s funeral was a religious piece that adorned her seldom-used dining room. The kitchen was where all the excitement happened if we weren’t outside having fun. This object was a carnival prize won by my Great Grandma Stobner for my dad. All I could think of when I learned that juicy tidbit–even after my mother uttered the phrase “that’s when you got good prizes”–is why this would be a gift for a child?

You’ll know what I mean in a minute but I want to give some background of what my cousins and my siblings thought of this ‘gift’. The title of this blog piece gives away the name we gave it and yes, it is an image of our Lord and Savior. That alone should warrant some respect, right? Not when you’re a small child and freaked out by an inanimate object that followed your every move. There Creepy Jesus stood on a hutch in along the back wall of the dining room. To get to the only bathroom in the house you had to go through said dining room. Unless you traversed the one side of the house’s flight of stairs going up and down the other side. The wonders of a duplex made into one living space. I did that sometimes when I didn’t get scolded for it. This was the Pittsburgh area, after all, and by doing that I came awfully close to the good living room kids were not allowed to enter.

So back to a young child needing use of said bathroom. Imagine, no matter where you looked, Creepy Jesus followed you. Don’t believe me? Pictures don’t lie.

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The person who came up with this figurine was pure evil! My siblings and crawled on our hands and knees, sometimes our bellies, to avoid getting stared at by Creepy Jesus. this was a gift … to a child. So when things were slowly leaving grandma’s house, my dad took his prize Grandma Stobner had won specifically for him.

The story doesn’t end there. As if the trauma of childhood wasn’t enough, my parents put this follower of all who enters its space in their bedroom. Think about that for a second. On second thought, don’t.

…Jesus is watching you masturbate…..

Ima Gonna Slap Someone

In March 2015, Bruce Jenner transitioned over to the person he always felt to be the real person within thanks to the wonders of plastic surgery. This past week, the world got to look on a very lovely Caitlyn Jenner thanks to Vanity Fair. I was stunned by the feminine charisma she emulated. Simply gorgeous and finally confident.

I cheered. Some of my friends cheered with me. Happiness in anyone’s life is something everyone should hope another gets out of life. We should strive to keep the little green monster at bay. To see someone that was a prominent sports figure in US history boldly make the transition from male to female.

Then there was the ‘friends’ the jeered. Posting things like “If Bruce wants to be called Caitlyn, that’s fine but Caitlyn is a he, not a she.” Oookay. I guess even though that ‘friend’ doesn’t’ have one, they are a massive dick so maybe I should call them a ‘he’. The biggest face palm has been the one that fell for something that wasn’t true and doesn’t care that it was proven otherwise. Read on to find out what that was:

Pricks

Pricks

Someone thought it would be a good ha-ha to circulate a story that Noah Galloway was the runner up for the Arthur Ashe Courage Award. I find Noah so inspirational for what he’s overcome with his injuries. Yet the story had a flaw–News flash: there is no runner up. If other people are considered, they aren’t even mentioned in any way. Would Lauren hill been a good candidate? Sure! There are plenty of people in this world that could have won. In any case, those who don’t seek out the truth and like to start mass hysteria for their own hate-filled agenda, took the ball and ran with it. I’m sure the person who started the meme is cackling in a corner over this. Me? Not so much.

Snopes debunked the internet story but the hate continued so much that I walked away from the conversation. I don’t have time narrow-minded jackasses in my life. I believe it’s not so much who could have won more than the person who did. I mean Caitlyn embodies what the Arthur Ashe Courage Award is all about.

The Arthur Ashe Courage Award is an award that is part of the ESPY Awards. Although it is a sport-oriented award, it is not limited to sports-related people or actions, as it presented annually to individuals whose contributions “transcend sports”.

Your know who won in 2014? Michael Sam, an openly gay athlete that frankly I think the NFL didn’t really give a chance. He plays in a Canadian league now. How about 2015? Robin Roberts. Again, openly gay. Maybe I missed the hate march on these two great people. Then again, I’m not into goose stepping against the LGBT community either.

So many people could have won this award but isn’t that the case with a lot of awards? Kanye West incident, anyone?

Caitlyn Jenner his female parts now. Total transformation. Nothing male remains so get over it, haters. She’s free–something that was a dream for so long. All the former wives knew what Caitlyn wanted to be. We’ve made so many strides in our world with equality for all.

Baby Jesus is crying again. All that work he did to help the poor, the suffering. He didn’t judge. Harlots and criminals were in his midst. Fear is a terrible thing and I believe this is what makes people point their fingers all judgey-like.

Fuck, fuck, FUCK. I loathe having to toss out the Jesus card. I know preachers way less douchey about this stuff than those who don’t don the cloth to shepherd their flock.

So you go girl! Rock that new body Caitlyn and fuck the haters. They be jelly without the peanut butter. Peace out.