Jocelyn Adams challenged me to a “look” contest. I thought it a bit fun and out of the norm you usually see in blog pokes.
So, the name of the game is to take a current WiP (I have several) and find the word “look” in them. “Look” is that nasty word that should be used sparingly. It gives editors that twinge in their eye. I’ve tried to avoid it but it doesn’t mean is doesn’t crop up.
I’ve decided to leaf through Sasha’s Gift since it is the one I’m trying to give a little more story. I found five instances were I used the word, mostly in dialogue which is not taboo.
- 1: His potential courter backed up a few steps. “Nah. You prefer to get rammed in the ass more than I do. At least, that’s what it looked like. I lost count after the eleventh guy mounted you.”
- 2: Dirty but out of the cold, Sasha spent the last of his money on a few good meals and a bed at a sleazy motel. He hoped to hitch a ride out of the city and never look back.
- 3: “Yeah.” David withdrew. Sasha turned around and joined him on the couch. Two steaming mugs were on the small table. Sasha lifted one up for a drink, intent on not looking David’s way. The man had helped him because that was his nature, not because he wanted to bed his lost lamb.
For shits and grins, I opened another one of my naughty pieces titled Beneath the Boughs It contained thirteen ‘look’ variations. Yikes! Seven of them aren’t in an dialoge. Double yikes! I’ll give you two from that stream for the hell of it.
- 1: “I wish not to talk about it.” Lily pursed her lips and began her day under Morgan’s watchful eye. She shivered when the heat of his body crossed behind her and every time his hands reached over to guide her work. At least he had put a shirt on. For all his scowls and cross looks toward her, she could not deny the urge to touch his skin. His domineering manner made her try all the harder to get his approval.
- 2: The lips parted from hers and she realized the room had gone quiet. Blinking, Lily gasped as she looked into the eyes of Morgan beneath the mask of blue feathers. Hands tore her away from his grasp and whirled her around. Dumbfounded, she froze as Miss Siena regarded her with harsh eyes.
I haven’t perused Beneath the Boughs lately. Looks like I’ve got some editing to do with that puppy. Maybe, if I’m lucky, I’ll get it set up for a winter release to coincide with the story.